…I’m in a weird position here. I CAN’T be the only one who’s had this happen to them.

Ok, so…every SINGLE time I hang out with my very best friend, it ALWAYS ends up being romantic….like, “omg…this is so perfect!” moments. Every single time. And it’s always been that way. When we hung out in (my 8th and her 7th) grade, it happened THEN too…in fact, we didn’t hang out forever BECAUSE it kept happening. And we started again this year, because of the simple fact that we ended up doing a lot in school together to begin with. And the romantic stuff started again.

In band, we ALWAYS got paired up on the slower, more romantic-y songs and at the concerts, we would both sit next to each other (because we had to sit next to who we’d be sitting next to/standing next to) and watch the other groups play…it was like going to Shea’s or something, because we were all dressed up and extremely close together in those seats.

Next, I had to do some volunteer work for honor society, so I decided to plant flags on veterans graves for memorial day. She was there. Hell, she was the one who ORGANIZED the whole damn thing. It ended up me and her working the whole day together, and SOMEHOW, the combination of me and her working under trees in the sahde in beautiful weather surrounded by flowers….Anyway, it got to the point where the news crew that showed up to interview her (and ended up me, too) thought (and acted) like me an her were dating. THEN, people who saw us on the interviews on TV thought the same thing….hell, our BAND teacher suggested we start dating.

Then came the pops concert, which is what blew the whole thing up. We were waiting off the stage outside because we had like 5 pieces to wait between when we would play again (which is normal at pops). Me, her, the other 3 drummers and 2 other people were out there, we were all just talking, and it was dark by then. However, somewhere along the way, only me and her were left. “Hey Jude” was coming through the open door on a slow tenor sax solo. It was me and her..with slow music….and stars….I swear to God, it was like out of a fucking harlequin romance book. I wanted to kiss her at the point….and I didn’t.

We talked about it afterwards, maybe a week after, and we openly admitted that we were both aware that this always happens, and despite her having a bf of a year and me a gf of 4 months at the time, that we liked each other and had for years. We decided to make the hanging out as sparse as possible to try and not destroy our relationships. We hung out maybe 3 weeks later, down at the canal, in full view of other people, planned that way to make it so it wouldn’t be romantic-y (yes, we openly planned it). Kicker is, we ended up with a wedding (yes a WEDDING) 30 feet to out backs. And the water was perfectly calm. And fucking SWANS were swimming up to us. And the fucking sun was fucking setting fucking perfectly. Again, we both resisted the urge to like, hug and kiss and all that jazz.

Then, a month later, or so, during canal fest, I hung out with her again after she got off work…we hung out for maybe 45 minutes, ‘round 8. We sat down in full view of other people (again, purposely trying avoid it) on the canal by the river in gateway. There was a full group of partiers around us and everything; seemed like for once, it wouldnt be romantic. Until the people around us slowly disappeared and after maybe 20 minutes, I was alone with her, facing another fucking sunset with no one around….aaaaaaaand it happened again, same as before.

At this point, we decided to avoid it as much as possible because it was starting to become too much to hod back.

So, last night, she came to my grad party. Everything was fine, thought I finally had it right because there were a dozen of our peers there and all of my family. Nothing could go wrong right? Well, after people started leaving, me, her, my brothers, their friends and a few others got into the pool for about an hour or so….until it got dark. Me and her were swimming and looking at the stars….and after we got out, with everyone else, and AGAIN, everyone slowly disappeared around us. Even the guy me and her were talking to together got up to go to the bathroom and didnt come back because he ended up playing video games with my brothers. As we both admitted today, the only thing that stopped us from kissing was when my cousin came out for a beer and gave us a weird look. Yeeeeah.

I feel like fate (or God or whatever) is pushing us together, and she agrees. We’ve both come to the consensus that at some point in out lives, we’re gonna end up together.

So I guess my question is…next time this happens…should I just kiss her and get it over with? See what happens, if it’s sexual tension and I’ll feel nothing or if it’s something more and I’m in trouble….? She feels the same way as I do but keep in mind, I;m in a long distance relationship of 6 months and her with some guy here, a year and some odd months. So…even with that…should I just kiss her and see what happens or should I respect the fact that we’re in a relationship?